Getting Dads in Front of the Camera

I've written a lot recently about the importance of us moms getting into pictures with our children.  It's equally important, of course, for dads to get in the frame too!  In our family, this happens all the time since I'm so enthusiastic about documenting our family life. But in many families, Dad may be the family photographer.  Or perhaps Dad just isn't comfortable being in front of the camera.  In honor of Father's Day, here are some of my favorite pictures of awesome Dads in the picture with their kids.

Regardless of who might be the primary family photographer, I think both moms and dads can see the value in parents being in pictures with their kids when they look back on photos like these that show the connection, love, and devotion that is so special between parents and children.  One great thing about documentary, candid photography is that it takes the formality and discomfort out of family photos.  When all you have to do is what you'd be doing anyway - enjoying time with your family - you tend to forget about the camera and beautiful real life moments happen.

Having such visual reminders of these ordinary, but special moments months and years from now when our children have grown and changed so much helps us remember a time and place that, while gone, is just as meaningful as it was when we were living it.  As Rose Kennedy said, "Life isn't a matter of milestones, but of moments."

It can be easy to underestimate how much the everyday matters, but when you have images that capture the love and connection of your family, you can easily remember the value of such time well spent.

I love documenting these moments for parents to look back on, but what makes my heart smile even more is thinking about the children having these moments documented to look back on. Moments they may have been too little to remember.  Moments that allow for glimpses into who they were from the very beginning. And glimpses into who their parents were when they were children and maybe too young to realize how special that time was.

Happy Father's Day to all the awesome Dad's out there young and old!

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How to Prepare for a Documentary Session | Northern Virginia Family Photographer

Finding a photographer that's right for your family can be hard. Even when you've found a good fit, preparing for your session can be stressful. There are some factors that are just out of our control - weather, sickness, and sometimes our family members' moods.  The best thing to do to mitigate these factors and prepare for your session is to relax. If mom or dad, or whoever is organizing the session is stressed over it, chances are, everyone else in the family will be too. The last thing you want to remember when you see your pictures years from now is the stress you hid behind fake smiles.

Thankfully, the nature of documentary-style takes much of the guesswork out of what makes for a great session.  Just being yourself will result in genuine pictures that capture your family's connection and personality.  Sometimes being yourself is easier said than done though. 

Your family may be great with going with the flow. Or perhaps you feel more comfortable having a bit of a plan to go by. Either approach is fine - the point is to do what's right for your family and what will create an environment that is relaxed and natural for you.

Here are a few typical questions that arise about documentary sessions with answers that can help you relax and enjoy the experience.

What do we do? We're boring!

This just isn't true. Whatever you do for entertainment in your family is fun for you, otherwise you'd be doing something else!  Don't worry about what you think other people will find interesting. The beauty of a documentary session is capturing what makes your family your family. Think about how your spend your time together. When/where are you most relaxed, having fun, and enjoying the moment?

There are two approaches to take:

Schedule your session for a typical day. In your family, a typical day might involve activities such as making breakfast, reading books with your kids, folding laundry while they play, settling in for a nap, or just enjoying some downtime. Planning a session around a normal day is a good way to keep your kids feeling relaxed throughout the session.

Plan one or two activities that your family enjoys doing together. These can be low-key or high energy. Maybe you have a special family recipe for macadamia cookies or a friendly rivalry playing Monopoly. Or maybe you enjoy hiking in a nearby park or playing soccer in the backyard. The trick with this approach is doing something that comes natural to your family. Letting your kids (especially older ones) pick an activity is a great way to get them involved in the session rather than feeling forced.

How do we act natural with a camera in our face? Won't it be weird with a stranger in our home?  Yes, it can be a little weird having someone with a camera documenting your day. My approach to a documentary session is to be somewhere between a fly-on-the-wall and an old family friend. I'll engage your family throughout the session, asking questions or playing with the kids.  And sometimes I'll step back to give you your space and document a moment quietly. Typically, after about half an hour, you'll forget about the camera or at least be much less aware of its presence. Follow the lead of your children - they're usually the first to forget.

My child/spouse/self isn't comfortable in front of the camera.  I'm not either. The trick is to plan your session around an environment or activity where you most feel yourself.  (Am I starting to sound like a broken record yet?) In home sessions and everyday activities are wonderful for capturing relaxed, natural moments where you look your best because you're in your element, present in the moment, and not worried about what to do next.

Find out more about family documentary sessions here. Or contact me here or in the comments below with your questions.

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Celebrating the Bigger Story | Northern Virginia documentary family photography

"Life must be lived as play." - Plato

When Allison contacted me about documenting her family's celebration of her father's 75th birthday, I was excited.  Family celebrations are full of love and fun.  When she mentioned her Dad was a comic fan and the party would be super hero-themed with costumes, I was ecstatic.  How cool would this be? And it was!

It was a beautiful day for documenting an outdoor party in Northern Virginia - sunshine, warm weather - everything one could hope for on an early spring day.  And we got to take full advantage of it.  Allison's father, Neil, has lovingly cultivated his beautiful backyard to be the perfect place for gatherings.  And he took particular care to set up a special area for the kids to play too.

With every guest that arrived, you could feel the love and respect for this family patriarch.  He was definitely the man of the hour, and in high demand, but he took time to play with each of his grandkids in between telling stories and joking with his guests.

Getting together with extended family and friends is always a special time, whether we live close by and get together often or far away and get together only for special occasions. How often do we come away from these gatherings with maybe a few group selfies or quick snapshots on our phone that might get posted to Facebook, but most often get lost in the digital depths of our phone (or worse lost for good when the unexpected happens to our phone)?

Selfies are great for showing our smiling faces, arms around loved ones.  But what about the bigger story of the day?  Where we were.  What brought us together. What we did together that was so uniquely us - our family.  It's difficult to capture those in-between moments when you're busy living them.

Capturing these details help us remember exactly what it felt like to be there.  To experience life in that moment.  These images help us remember how heartwarming it was to watch our father captivate a crowd with his storytelling and easy laugh.  Or how proud we were to watch when our little one worked up the nerve to go down the slide on her own and how happy her smile was when we caught her at the bottom.  Sure, the birthday itself is a big deal, but the reason everyone is really there is to celebrate the love they feel and honor they have for someone special. 

Those feelings are what make life sweet and preserving them with images is what makes family documentary sessions worthwhile.  Pictures that tell the story of life lived - busy, perhaps, but always full of love.

Learn more about these sessions and see more examples of these in-between moments captured on my information and gallery pages.

Tips for Documenting the Long-term | Northern Virginia Family Lifestyle and Documentary Photographer

"We are what we repeatedly do.  Excellence then is not an act but a habit." - Aristotle

I started my first 365 photography project two years ago.  I wanted to document our quickly growing son - the milestones and moments in between. My project expanded into telling a daily story of our family's life and interesting things we encountered along the way. Committing to taking and posting a photo a day for a year was intimidating, but now that I'm in my third year, I can't imagine not having these images from our life.

I now consider my 365 projects to be my personal form of daily journaling.  As much as I see value in writing down daily thoughts, photography as a medium comes more naturally and fits into my life more easily.  I naturally take pictures of things I find important or interesting, and when I do have an opportunity to write down snippets about our life, having these images evokes emotion and helps the words come more easily.  

Here are a few tips that keep me going when motivation is lacking or life gets busy:

1. Don't let rules get in the way of committing to a 365 (or any long-term) project.  Sure, the goal may be to take a photo a day, but the real objective is to create a body of work that represents a period in time. Missing a day or two here or there isn't going to prevent that big picture development.  Giving up because you're focused on perfection will.  The best part of a personal project is that you decide the rules yourself, so commit to what makes sense to you.

2. Find a supportive community.  There is a lot of support for 365 projects online - places to post, friendly feedback, and prompts for shooting ideas.  I also love participating in photography community challenges for inspiration, like National Geographic Your Shot and the CM Glimpse project. Facebook and Instagram are also full of groups for challenges, themes, and support from fellow photographers, no matter your skill-level.

3Celebrate your progress.  Whether you decide to post your project online or share on social media, having a place to see your work all in one place is wonderful motivation.  And there are bonus points for social sharing, if you enjoy receiving feedback and inspiration from others.  I use Flickr to keep all my 365 images in one place, but I also love Instagram and the variety of super-easy printing options for making quick prints. Which brings me to...

Print your images.  Having tangible evidence of your project is so gratifying.  I'll be sharing more about how I print and display my personal images in future posts, but I can't say how fun it is to see evidence of my work around my house and office.  I print a yearly compilation of my 365 images in a photo book and also make prints throughout the year for framing, displaying or sharing with family and friends.

If you're considering starting a 365 or other long-term personal project, I highly recommend it. And if you already have one, I'd love to hear about it and any tips you have!  Oh, and these are some of my favorites from April of my 365. :-)

Three Reasons to Get in the Picture, Mamas! | Northern VA, DC, and MD Documentary and Lifestyle Photographer

In honor of Mother's Day this weekend, I'm sharing a few of my favorite images of motherhood.  I'm also sharing three reasons why photographs are so important and why you should get in the frame with your kids.

1. We take photos of what is important to us.

People, events, moments.  The photographs that endure are those that remind us of something that is important.  Family, love, happiness.  These are all aspects of life that we don't want to forget.  We return to those photographs that help us remember what it was like to live in that moment - not only to cherish the past, but to remind us of what matters today.

2. Photographs send a message.

More than documenting these moments for ourselves, with photographs, we're sending a message to others, especially our children, that this is what matters to us.  Relationships with loved ones. Momentous occasions.  Daily activities that add up to a lifetime of memories. Seeing these images, especially in prints you can hold in your hands (more on that in a post to come!), speaks volumes.  Worth a thousand words, right? ;-)

3. Photographs are a part of our family history.

My mom is the historian in our family (thanks, Mama!) and I often tell her I wish we had pictures to go along with all the names and dates in our family tree.  I wish I could see what my ancestors looked like and have clues that give insight into who they were and what was important to them. My hope is that the images I take for my family and others' will become a part of our family stories, painting a more complete picture of where we came from and what mattered to us.

Taking pictures with our kids, not just of them, conveys how important they are to us and how dear we hold our relationship with them and our role as mother.  Documenting these aspects of our lives is not only important for them and for us, but for their children and for future family historians.

Young or old, the familial bond is one of the most enduring aspects of life.  So, now, whether your kids are 2, 20, or 62, go take a picture with them! And while you're at it, if you're fortunate enough to have the opportunity, take a picture with your Mom too!

And because it would be rude to ignore my own advice, here are a couple of recent favorites from my own moments in motherhood.  Happy Mother's Day!

Capturing Time with Grandparents | Northern Virginia & DC Documentary and Lifestyle Family Photographer

"Nothing makes the earth seem so spacious as to have friends at a distance; they make the latitudes and longitudes." -  Henry David Thoreau

We live further away from our family than we'd like and cherish the time we get to spend with them during visits home.  On Easter, we were lucky to have grandparents from both sides come to stay with us.  One of my favorite things about visiting with family is watching my son play with them.  It's so rewarding to see the love between them and to appreciate how all our lives are enriched with their presence.

One of the hardest things about family visits is trying not to document every single minute of it.  Even I don't want to wade through that many photos.  But just as importantly, I want to be a part of the memories, not just capture them.  And that can be hard to do when I'm fighting the urge to capture every moment. :-)  Oh, and I'd also like to be in the pictures occasionally too!  But more on that next week...  

We were lucky enough (after several years of trying!) to time the visit with peak bloom of the Cherry Blossoms in DC.  And it turns out the Jefferson Memorial makes for great toddler climbing (as long as you can catch them before they go for a swim in the Tidal Basin!).

Whatever pressure I feel as the family photographer is worth it when my son climbs into my lap and asks to see these pictures again and again.  It's hard to say goodbye, but the distance is made a little easier with moments like these captured to remember for a lifetime.  

A Photographer’s (and Mother's) Manifesto | Northern Virginia Family Photographer

(Or why I fell in love with documentary photography and how I hope you will too)

I have a tendency towards nostalgia.  I used to find it annoying to get all sentimental about things others seemed to brush off, like the change of seasons or packing up to go home from a family camping trip. And when my son was born, there came even more reasons to get sentimental. Every milestone seems to signal an end to a period of his childhood.  His growth is beautiful to witness, but I’ll probably always reminisce about how, as a newborn, he could sleep anywhere and through anything (as long as it was on me!) or how he loved to climb everything to change his view of the world. 

Northern Virginia family lifestyle and documentary photography, child climbing on furniture to play at window

As I document more of these moments with my camera, rather than lamenting sentimentality, I try to use it as a tool to recognize and capture moments that matter. What’s more, I'm coming to think of nostalgia as a reminder that what we do in our daily lives is important and worth remembering and being sentimental over. Even the monotonous and mundane make up who we are and contribute to the lives of those around us and, especially, those closest to us. In short, the little moments matter.  Like the silly songs I sing to get my son to open his mouth so we can brush his teeth.  Or how he loves to snuggle in close while we read to him.

I'm often reminded (especially when I'm feeling overwhelmed by my to-do list) of the popular Annie Dillard quote, "How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives." Dillard explains, "What we do with this hour, and the next one, is what we are doing." Focusing on the next activity before I'm finished with the first is so hard not to do.  I have an unending list of things I want to do (don’t we all!), but at the top, of course, is spending time with my family. Undistracted, present, quality time.  It's a learned skill, for me at least. I can be easily distracted by the running dialogue in my head (dinner, dishes, dirty laundry, work, etc.), but I like to think I’m getting better.  And it helps that my son is old enough now to participate in some of these mundane activities, like cooking dinner or feeding the cats and dog.  

Alexandria Virginia family lifestyle and documentary photography, candid child playing in window

An ever growing appreciation for the value in spending my moments wisely (even when I'm utterly failing) are reasons I love photography. I can capture candid, fleeting moments, whether part of a special day or simply revealing of the sweetness in the routine, to savor and discover anew when one day I've perhaps forgotten, for example, how my son tilts his head to the side and furrows his little eyebrows whenever he's thinking hard about something. Or how peaceful weekend mornings can be when the house is quiet and we stand at the window and marvel at the sunrise.

I used to think, "How could I ever forget something like this?"  But my memory fails me in so many ways. Life's daily demands have a way of overtaking space for even the sweetest moments that make up our days. Writing these moments down, taking pictures and videos - are all so important to helping us remember that what we do every day matters.  Hopefully, passing these memories on to our children and theirs will help them remember this lesson too.  As Aristotle put it, "You are what you repeatedly do." I'd like to repeatedly be present and appreciative of the simplest gift in life. Time to be with and celebrate loved ones and friends. And I want to capture that time beautifully to be remembered again and again.

Sentimental or not, this is why I’m passionate about documenting family moments. What are the moments that you want remember? And here's another manifesto, a more eloquent and farther reaching call to action than anything I could attempt, and one that inspires me to live more fully (and document along the way!). 

"Life is about the people you meet and the things you create with them." - from the Holstee Manifesto

Learn about my documentary photography sessions in Northern Virginia and surrounding areas here.